ABORT Magazine™

Film Review: Epic – Directed by Chris Wedge

May 24th, 2013 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Film Review: Epic
Directed by Chris Wedge
20th Century Fox

Originally slated to be released as “Leaf Men” before an eleventh hour change at the 20th Century Fox offices, EPIC is just that. A tale of outsiders and an unthinkably amazing/beautiful world, and of course a lesson that draws the outsider into a new understanding that their life isn’t as bad as it seemed… Or something like that. It’s a wonder that studios don’t take to this plot device more often *cough* avatarferngullyetc *cough*…

Despite being a re-hashed remake of a few notable predecessors, Epic brings a lot of its own to the table, and is best considered a fresh take on an old idea. Loosely based on William Joyce’s “The Leaf Men and the Brave Good Bugs”, Epic has a great starting ground, making a few notable changes turning Joyce’s green skinned namesakes into tiny bird-riding humans, which makes this film more a “magical world story” than a “gang of talking bugs” one. However, the script doesn’t disappoint in that regard with at least three loveable sassy insects who help the characters along the way.

Audiences are almost all guaranteed to like the flick, with intelligent humour, a familiar storyline, and a superb voice cast tying it all together. Leaf-Men Leader Ronin, played by Colin Farrell may be the real draw to EPIC for most, however his part feels largely contrived, pulling away from the main narrative with it’s own attempt at a plot line that is never realized. Instead, the story is strongest in regards to the characters M.K and Nod (Amanda Seyfried and Josh Hutcherson respectively) who drive the story through a series of repeated interactions with other creatures in the kingdom. Special mention has to go to Beyonce (Queen Tara) and Steven Tyler (Nim), who, while not usually known for lending their famous voices to cartoons, do so superbly.

Rounding it all out is two Academy award winner Christoph Waltz (Best Supporting under Tarantino in both Inglorious Bastards and Django) who plays the perhaps too scary for kids villain Mandrake (who was begging for his own stronger plot), Aziz Ansari as Mub, a rambunctious slug, and a seamless soundtrack from none-other than Danny Elfman, who must need several more hours in a day to find time to sleep.

Epic is one of those family films that a couple of thugs can go to and still enjoy it. Highly recommended to say the least.

EPIC OPENS NATIONWIDE TODAY, MAY 24th 2013!

By Scott Alexander

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Film Review: The Place Beyond The Pines – Directed by Derek Cianfrance

April 23rd, 2013 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

THE PLACE BEYOND THE PINES
Directed by Derek Cianfrance
Focus Features

The Place Beyond The Pines is a unique tale set in the small New York town of Schenectady. The narrative is broken up between three connected stories and four connected characters. We follow stunt bike rider Luke Glanton (Ryan Gosling), rookie police officer Avery Cross (Bradley Cooper) and finally their sons fifteen years later.

It feels odd using the word epic in relation to such a sombre, grounded drama, but in its own way The Place Beyond The Pines is definitely that. Both Luke and Avery are new fathers and are fighting to do what’s best for their respective families in their given circumstances. The film deftly explores how one person’s choices affect the lives of those around them and even those of people they never meet. It pace however is fairly slow and while always interesting, that coupled with its alternative storytelling may turn off a lot of average movie-goers.

The acting is stellar across the board. Gosling, Cooper and the oft-underrated Eva Mendes turn in amazing performances. The supporting cast (including greats like Ray Liotta and Harris Yulin) equally shine. Cooper does unfortunately suffer a bit in this film despite the quality of his performance simply because Gosling’s side of the story is light-years more interesting and engaging. Its a shame because Cooper is most certainly on his A game.

On the technical side of things, The Place Beyond The Pines really shines. Or rather, it doesn’t. The film’s art direction and photography perfectly capture the mood of the small town. The actors are plain, if not outright filthy. When you think of the three leads, glamour is often at the top of what you would associate them with, but that was all but gone during the film. The varying neighbourhoods, from the modest suburban homes to the rundown hotels and shacks of other areas breathe a real personality into the movie and enhance the cast and story.

While it can be a little slow and uneven, The Place Beyond The Pines is also refreshing in how it is told and backed up by strong performances and environment. I would recommend giving it a look.

The Place Beyond The Pines is in theatres everywhere NOW!

By JB Pauls

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Copyright © 2004-2013 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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Film Review: Zero Dark Thirty – Directed by Kathryn Bigelow

January 11th, 2013 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Film Review: Zero Dark Thirty
Directed by: Kathryn Bigelow
Alliance Releasing

Kathryn Bigelow, whose Iraq War opus “The Hurt Locker” acquired a great many Oscars and much box office revenue, returns to similar topics with “Zero Dark Thirty”, a somewhat scattered look about the hunt for Osama Bin Laden through the eyes of a CIA Operative.

Jessica Chastain plays Maya, a recently appointed operative assigned in 2003 to interrogate potential informants about the whereabouts of Bin Laden. Now, if you’ve been paying attention, the interrogation methods in 2003 under the Bush administration weren’t exactly rosy (the CIA was accused of torture in several instances) and the film reflects this. Tactics like this (and others developed during the years following) produced small leads, one after the other. As the years rolled by, more informants were interviewed, places were checked out, missions were embarked upon, with some successes. Even with that, they’re hardly anywhere closer to finding the guy, until one day the CIA notice a peculiar set of clues that begin to tie in with a mysterious messenger that may be the breakthrough they’re looking for.

At a whopping two and a half hours, the story here is really quite expansive, covering eight years of the search. Unusually episodic, Bigelow separates everything with title cards which are somewhat unnecessary (but will provide handy DVD chapter stops no doubt). The film on occasion does lag a bit, especially when it gets a wee bit on the political side of things, but the performance by Chastain keeps us sucked in, making us root for her.

While this is, by in large, a good-to-great movie, I do have questions though about what happens three quarters of the way through, and Bin-Laden is located. As we all know, a team of Navy Seals went in and took out Bin Laden. Interestingly, the film stops what it’s doing (mainly the story about Maya, the CIA operative) and all of sudden focuses on all aspects of this mission, making this from a savvy docudrama into Act Of Valor II. Why Bigelow chose to just shift 90 degrees to a completely different movie at that point sure is mysterious. Not that there’s nothing wrong with this portion, it certainly is interesting and fascinating (and in some points, brutal) about the way the seals methodically went about this mission. But hello! There’s a lady that was acting her heart out here in that other part of the movie! Never you mind, Chastain’s performance still does shine in the end, and will be the thing that’s remembered about this film.

(And probably by the Oscar voters.)

By Bill Taylor

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Copyright © 2004-2013 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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Film Review: Promised Land – Directed by Gus Van Sant

January 4th, 2013 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Film Review: Promised Land
Directed by Gus Van Sant
Focus Features

I’m a big fan of Gus Van Sant and Matt Damon’s work (separately and together), and of course, their collaborations together have produced Oscars (Good Will Hunting being the most well known). Their latest effort, “Promised Land,” a film about about natural gas fracking offers a story so thin and characters so ridiculously naive that you actually feel sorry for all those involved.

Steve Butler (Played by Damon) and Sue Thomason (Played by Frances McDormand) are two lobbyists who work for a large Natural Gas Company assigned to a small town to get the okay from residents to start exploring for natural gas on their land (a process called fracking). Damon thinks he’s got it all under control until an old coot (Hal Holbrook) actually starts voicing opposition at a town hall meeting. Flustered, Damon is at a loss for words and sulks off. Um, excuse me, if he’s such a high powered and smart lobbyist, wouldn’t he better prepared to take on this country hick and bury him if necessary? Since this was not done, Damon and McDormand need to stay a few more days to try to convince the locals that this is the way to go, leading up to a town vote on the matter. Problem is, another lobbyist from an environmental group (played by John Krasinski) also arrives in town also trying to woo the residents NOT to vote for this proposal, since he says natural gas fracking will screw up the land. Damon AGAIN decides to let this low-level country hick walk all over him and his plans (and the local girl he was wooing in town) without easily contacting higher-ups for some back up to deal with this yokel. Well, OK, he DOES get info about the guy, but not until it’s too late to have much impact. A lot of things seem to whiz by Damon’s character it seems, making him rather ineffectual until he smartens up just in time for the vote and The Big Speech At The End.
Matt Damon, working with a new writer this time (his co-star Krasinski) knows how to develop characters (Krasinski’s character is especially interesting) but the story he puts them in is unfortunately lacking cohesion or comprehension to really enjoy this film.

By Bill Taylor

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Film Review: Red Dawm, Directed by Dan Bradley

November 21st, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Red Dawn
Directed By Dan Bradley
Alliance Releasing

With all the reboots happening nowadays, it’s interesting that producers would decide to remake “Red Dawn”, the Reagan-era “students against the Russkies” movie from 1984, which starred a who’s-who of up and coming teen talent, including Patrick Swayze, C. Thomas Howell and Charlie Sheen. It was also a brutal affair, with nearly everyone dying, and a grim prognosis ahead. The producers of this film have tried to update this film using many actors-you’ve-never-heard-of-but-many-16-year-olds-have. (Chris Hemswort, Josh Hutcherson, Connor Cruise), give em guns, and start defending their country from the evil-doers! Seems like a no-brainer right?

Well, not really.

The main thing that significantly flaws this film is the lack of a powerful antagonist the teens are going against, In the original 1984 movie, the Russians were still a force and a menace many people were still afraid of, and Ronald Reagan (and to some effect, Hollywood) sought to lambast Americans to believing they were The Greatest And Toughest People In The World, Flash-forward 28 years: The attitude of Americans isn’t what it used to be, and the “Super-Power” label is not quite a fit anymore. As well, aside from the Taliban regime, there isn’t a huge enemy the US can take on in a movie like this, so the fact that North Korea is taking over the US is a bit…. Farfetched?!? I mean China, yes (Actually, China WAS supposed to be the original aggressors, but fearing international backlash, the producers changed it around) but North Korea, while being strange, mysterious and slightly dangerous, doesn’t quite fit the bill as a country that could attack the U.S.

But, attack the U.S. they did, according to this film. If you can get over THAT, then this film is a passable thriller I suppose, but whatever heart and grit the original film had (and it had a lot of it actually) is missing here, since the enemy is pretty minor.

IN THEATRES TODAY!

By Bill Taylor

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Copyright © 2004-2012 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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Film Review: Dredd 3D – Directed by Pete Tarvis

September 20th, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Dredd 3D
Directed by Pete Tarvis
Lionsgate

“Dredd” is an interesting, sort of non-linear superhero movie from what we’re used to seeing. Heck, if you thought Nolan’s Batman was odd and different, wait til you see what Pete Tarvis does with his Dredd.

Not to be confused with the dreadfully silly “Judge Dredd” movie from 1995 with Sylvester Stallone (and Rob Schneider! Oh, how we’ve missed you). Dredd does something interesting. That is, make the character have, well, no character. We don’t know of his background, what makes him tick, why he’s so hell-bent on violence to everyone, and anything. Heck, the guy… DOESN’T EVEN TAKE OFF HIS MASK FOR THE WHOLE MOVIE. I wonder what Karl Urban, who you may remember playing Bones in the Star Trek reboot, thought when this concept was brought to him. Having said that, with a lack of character depth, you would think this film would fall on it’s face, but oddly enough, because the film is so strictly against telling us who Dredd is, it, in fact, is somewhat totally original for having the balls for doing it. It totally works in this circumstance. It’s sort of interesting, that the antagonist drug lord in this movie (played by the always amazing Lena Headey) and Dredd’s partner (played by Olivia Thirlby) get a lot more character development then Dredd does, but never you mind. It totally works. The mission he is on is to kill a ruthless and psychotic female drug dealer holed up on the top floor of an apartment building with her equally ruthless and psychotic army of killers willing to protect her at all costs. Level by level, Dredd must overcome these criminals, each with a more and more deadlier arsenal of weapons. If this sounds familiar, it should. This is pretty much the exact same plot line used for the earlier-in-year Indonesian Cop flick “The Heist: Redemption”. So much so, it’s almost plagiarism. But never too mind, because it is easy to like Dredd more then that movie. Dredd definitely adds to the plot line of “The Heist” and makes the action more intense and fun, with it’s crazy shoot-outs and situations… All in 3-D of course. The film obsesses itself sometime with the use of slow motion on occasion, making glass pieces just float through the air. Once again, because we seem confident with the odd choices the director is making, it doesn’t distract from the film. As a matter of fact. Dredd could almost be considered an art-house superhero film, one that doesn’t follow Hollywood rules, and leaves us with a refreshing take on the action film.

IN THEATRES THIS FRIDAY!

By Bill Taylor

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Copyright © 2004-2012 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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Film Review: The Words – Directed by Brian Klugman and Lee Sternthal

September 6th, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

The Words
Directed by Brian Klugman and Lee Sternthal
CBS Films

“The Words” is a very interesting, multilayer movie whose main plot is about a struggling young author who finds an abandoned manuscript in an old briefcase he buys in Paris, and in a moment of desperation, decides to pawn the writing off as his own. The book he “writes” turns out to be a bestseller, and he becomes a literary phenomenon. But then an old man confronts him, it’s the author of the original manuscript! Soon the author has to make some tough choices of what to do, whom to tell, and what should be done to rectify the situation with the old codger.

This story, while very involving, is certainly not the most original. Plagiarism has been a topic used occasionally in movies, but this film adds a few more levels of storytelling, as we find out how the original manuscript was written by the old man, and we are flash-backed into war-time Paris, as a younger Amercian soldier falls in love in lovely French girl, loses girl, writes book etc. this part of the story doesn’t REALLY add anything to the central plot, but it’s interesting nevertheless as it definitely adds some back story to the old man’s story.

When the viewer thinks they have it all figured out… This plagiarism plot line… doesn’t actually happen! It’s actually part of ANOTHER storyline about a successful writer (played by Dennis Quaid) who is reading from his new novel, called “The Words” about this author, who finds a manuscript in Paris… Quaid, after finishing this reading engagement, meets a young lady who either wants to bone him, or is actually interested in what motivated him to write this book. The other parts of the movie is actually sandwiched between that plot line. So yes, we have a plot line within a plot line within a plot line here (Meta on that for a while, Abed). Although all the stories are well meaning and certainly interesting, it’s just too bogged down with confusing subplots. The main plot line, and we’re talking about the plagiarist author storyline here, is by far the most interesting. Bradley Cooper, playing the author, does a fine job in portraying a man torn with serious moral and ethical issues, and he is finely complimented by Zoe Saldana as his wife. The Hemingway-esque soldier in Paris secondary plot is certainly interesting and I can see how it relates to the story. But the central framework, the story about the author reading from the book, just feels totally unnecessary and not needed. Maybe there was something obvious that I missed, but I felt this whole piece of the plot could have been edited out, and we would have been left with a perfectly fine movie.

IN THEATRES THIS FRIDAY!

By Bill Taylor

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Copyright © 2004-2012 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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Film Review: The Possession – Directed by Ole Bornedal

August 30th, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

The Possession
Director: Ole Bornedal
Lionsgate

The phrase “Based On A True Story” has somewhat lost it’s credibility over the last few years. Ever since the Coen Brothers’ put that statement on their movie “Fargo” a number of years ago which caused a flurry of activity to figure out whether it was true or not, (It wasn’t), the term nowadays seems to be slapped on a movie and we have to figure out what on earth is true or not.

Case in point, in the new paint-by-numbers horror movie “The Possession” we’re TOLD it’s BASED on a true story, but what aspects? There was a possession of a young girl? That weird things started happening when someone acquired a strange box? That a couple got divorced? In all actuality according to press materials, the director acquired a box from a Jewish holocaust survivor that she says contained a “Dybbuk”, or an evil spirit from Jewish Folklore. So THAT”S where the “true story” aspect comes from in this movie. Having religious-cross-over demons certainly IS interesting, but “The Possession” doesn’t really exploit the fun possibilities this could have had. Instead, we get a pretty standard story of a newly divorced father trying to appease his young daughters by letting them buy anything they want for his new house. One of the daughters purchases a box, and yes, almost immediately, strange things start to happen with her. Now, you think with a Dybbuk, that maybe something sinister, but you know, in a Jewish way, would happen. But no, unfortunately. Apparently the demon world shows no religious denomination when it comes to possessing souls. The usual insects flying out of nowhere, low guttural voices, and walking-funny scenes are all in effect. While this is happening, Dad, (a rather uninspired character by The Watchmen’s Jeffrey Dean Morgan) is trying to be the best father he can, but when the possessed daughter thing starts to happen. Mom, (played by a slumming Kyra Sedgewick) blames him for his daughter’s odd behavior (another interesting idea not fully fleshed out). Too bad “The Possession” winds up where it is, just another Exorcist knock-off, when it really could have had the potential to be a whole lot more.

IN THEATRES AUGUST 31!

By Bill Taylor

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Copyright © 2004-2012 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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Film Review: Hit and Run – Directed by David Palmer and Dax Shepard

August 23rd, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Hit and Run
Directors: David Palmer, Dax Shepard
Open Road Films

“Hit And Run” is a very interesting and spirited attempt to combine two films into one. The modern day chase picture, and the somewhat gross-out, more adult-oriented comedies of today (aka The Hangover) but unfortunately, the script totally outshines the very two-dimensional characters, causing this chase movie to stall quite a bit.

The story centers around Charlie (Dax Shepard) and Annie (Kirsten Bell), a likeable couple who live out in the middle of nowhere. Annie has a pretty good career going as a mediation instructor. When a position opens up in L.A., custom made for her, she’s all gung-ho to go. Problem is, her boyfriend is on the witness protection program, and any attempt to leave the area where they are will result in him being removed from police protection and possibly being in great danger if he his found by his old partners in crime.

The film for the most part works. The on screen pairing of Bell and Shepherd (who is definitely oozing a Nicholas Cage vibe here) are quite likeable together, and the script they get to work with is breezy, tight and offers plenty of laughs. There are some cheap crude jokes, sure, but mostly keep the plot going and seem less distracting then usual (there’s a lot of gay jokes, for example, all of them which I found funny, especially it’s riff on the online cellphone app Grindr, which was overdue for ribbing). The main problem one may have with this movie is that most of the characters seem woefully underwritten. Take for example, Annie. Even though she’s college educated and smart as a whip, she becomes instantly stupid once the shit starts hitting the fan and just becomes a minor secondary character taking a back seat to the action and the drama Charlie seems to be in. The antagonists in this flick don’t fare much better either. The leader of the gang (played by Bradley Cooper) who wanders from being mildly sympathetic to mildly psychotic, with no real explanation given to his motives on what makes him that way. His group of henchmen are just barely there, script-wise and action-wise. (The only gleaming hope is Tom Arnold, playing Charlie’s hapless witness protection agent, who has a dozen plus skeletons in his closet. Unfortunately, Tom Arnold certainly can’t save this movie. Actually, it’s all about the hard driving story and action here folks, so if something like that appeals to you and not much else, then this is the movie for you.

IN THEATRES AUGUST 24!

By Bill Taylor

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Copyright © 2004-2012 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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Film Review: ParaNorman – Directed by Chris Butler and Sam Fell

August 20th, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

ParaNorman
Directed by Chris Butler and Sam Fell
Alliance Releasing

Armed with an interesting and original storyline, the makers of ParaNorman take the familiar structures of many different genres of horror movies, (Kid talking to the dead, dead stalking a town, Witch’s curse threatens town, etc) and weaves them all into something wildly creative, but perhaps limiting it’s appeal due to it’s unusual and dark animation.

Norman, (voiced by Kodi Smit-McPhee – The non vampire kid in “Let Me In”) is a bit of a mixed up kid. He’s picked on at school, by neighbors and even by his family members because of his annoying belief that he can communicate with the dead. The family is especially freaked out over his insistence that his otherwise-dead grandmother is in the next room watching tv and knitting away. The only person who believes Norman can communicate with the afterlife is (of course) the local weirdo in town. He needs to find Norman to warn him about something, but dies before he can tell him everything he needs to know. But bit by bit, Norman starts figuring out things on his own. There’s going to be a zombie apocalypse! And somehow, a witch, who has put a curse on the town a hundred years ago will return to wreak havoc again! Norman (and the friends he’s convinced) have to stop this all from taking place, but Norman, seemingly smarter than anyone else, goes deeper and figures out why things are happening the way they are.

Although this could have gotten predictable quite quickly, the first-time director-and-screenwriter, Chris Butler, keeps things going at a brisk and fun pace. The motley crew of characters Norman has joining him seem to be on the other side of stupid, which makes Norman’s job that much more harder. The whole town, for example, upon finding out there’s a group of zombies in their midst, become a let’s-burn-the-windmill-down mob, where as the zombies, who have been CLEARLY misunderstood of their intentions, just want to leave, Butler uses this, and other situations, to draw us in, making us believe the story is going in one direction, while slyly going into another altogether.

The only complaint one may have with this movie is the animation. Aside from Norman, everyone in this is rather crudely and grotesquely animated, and depending on your liking for that sort of thing, may or may not turn you off. Personally, this writer just found it to be a distraction more than anything. That, along with the somewhat dark subject matter, may limit the audience appeal of this. But it all personal preference really. But one thing is for sure, this will definitely reach cult status with the Nightmare Before Christmas and Corpse Bride.

IN THEATRES WORLDWIDE NOW!

By Bill Taylor

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Copyright © 2004-2012 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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Film Review: Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter – Directed by Timur Bekmambetov

June 21st, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Film Review: Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
Directed by Timur Bekmambetov
Bazelevs Production

A surprisingly-cheesy film (even by action/horror movies standards), Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is a movie that is strong on premise, weak on delivery.

Based on the novel by Seth Grahame-Smith (who also wrote the adapted screenplay), Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter takes the 16th President of the United States and casts him in the role of a vampire-killing machine, complete with silver-tipped axe and wondrous martial arts abilities. I don’t know about you, but I like the idea of What-If stories: Honest Abe in his stovepipe hat facing off against the undead hordes? What could possibly go wrong?

The film starts off predictably for a monster movie – a young Abraham witnesses his mother being murdered by a vampire, then swears vengeance on the creature. However, the twist is that the vampire responsible is part of a larger cabal of undead who have taken control of the Southern states for the slaves and their usefulness as a food source. Bet you didn’t learn that in history class.

However, when a movie gets to the “training montage” within the first 20 minutes, you know that story and plot is not the priority. Yes, I know what you’re thinking, and my response to that is: even when you suspend your disbelief, a story still has to make sense. Unfortunately, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter has very little sense to spare.

Just a few of the many plot holes I noticed along the way:

1. When Abraham (Benjamin Walker) first meets his future wife Mary Todd (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), she is engaged to be married to a senator. However, in what seems like days, she has fallen for him and he asks her to marry him. There is no scene where her other engagement is called off. There is one scene where the senator shoots them a disapproving glance and that’s it.

2. When Abraham Lincoln grows up to become a president, he matures into grey hair and wrinkles as only the passage of time can bring. Yet his childhood friend and presidential advisor Will appears to not have aged a day since his twenties.

3. These vampires can walk around in the sunlight?

Under director Timur Bekmambetov, the action sequences almost make up for the films story shortcomings. The climax of a train barrelling along a rail bridge set on fire is quite the action piece, and the film has of the best wire and bullet-time work in a film since the Matrix. Unfortunately, the lacklustre story makes it almost impossible to stay properly engaged.

A missed opportunity to really create something fun for the summer movie crowd. Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter has it’s moments, but overall it’s disappointing.

Rating: 1.5 / 4 stars

OPENS NATIONWIDE TOMORROW

By Daniel Chai

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Copyright © 2004-2012 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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Film Review: Prometheus – Directed by Ridley Scott

June 7th, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Film Review: Prometheus
Directed by – Ridley Scott
20th Century Fox

2012 marks a thirty year sci-fi fast for Ridley Scott. It was 1982’s ‘Blade Runner’ where Scott last sparked our collective imaginations on what lay ahead in humanities path, and three more years since 1979’s ‘Alien’ terrified all. In what many were assuming was to be an Alien prequel, Prometheus brings the famed director back into the captains chair to command the future once again.

When Scott and his screenplay team of Jon Spaihts and Damon Lindelof set out to make the movie, they’re quoted as labeling the flick an “Alien/Blade Runner mashup.” While this definitely put fans collective hopes into hyperspace, it opened itself up for all sorts of fan disappointment in the wake of two epics. The fact Prometheus is offered up on a 3D platter only offered additional hope and despair to the two camps.

Prometheus stars Noomi Rapace as a perhaps blind idealist Elizabeth Shaw, and Logan Marshall-Green as Charlie Holloway as two star-crossed (in a literal sense) lovers who set out to discover the origins of humanity. Shaw hypothesizes it was a race of aliens that she lovingly dubs the Engineers. Having found almost indisputable proof on earth, the duo, with the help of a 35,000 year old map and the Weyland Corporation (die-hard Alien fans will take note of the company name) set off in stasis on a two year journey across the stars aboard the movies namesake, a spaceship of unimaginable design, watched over by an increasingly odd being named David.

Michael Fassbender brilliantly portrays David, a seemingly sociopathic synthetic human with a God complex. It’s easy to draw comparisons early on between David’s skewed curiosity and the philosophical nature of Roy Batty, the Nexus-6 replicant leader of Blade Runner. The similarities between the two however end there, or do they? Perhaps the most brilliant thing about Fassbender’s portrayal of David is that he really is an enigma, in the truest sense.

In important, but supporting roles, Charlize Theron (Meredith Vickers) and Guy Pearce (Peter Weyland), work flawlessly with the rest of the rag-tag Prometheus crew with, and often times against our star struck protagonists. The ability for Ridley Scott to bring each character into the story in an important, and unforgettable way, even if that character is simply destined to wear the ‘red-shirt’

With an unmistakably Ridley touch to each and every detail, this film is sure to be placed on a pedestal. After so many sci-fi movies in the past three decades drawing on the same gimmicks, it will be an interesting few years ahead, as new life is breathed back into the genre.

It must be said that Prometheus brings to the table it’s own mythos, while sometimes offering up subtle easter-eggs from the Alien saga to sate the sci-fi nerd in all of us…

…Though, sometimes not too subtle

By Scott Alexander

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Film Review: Piranah 3DD – Directed by John Gulager

June 1st, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Film Review: PIRANHA 3-DD
Directed by John Gulager
Alliance Films

Enough is enough with the whole “let’s make a horror movie that’s so bad, it’s camp, and let’s reap the profits” movies people seem to be making these days. Like the abysmal Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus, Two Headed Shark, or heck, even the original Piranha movie of this series from 2010 (there was a far superior, much more tongue-in-cheek-smarter Piranha movie made in 1978, written by John Sayles and directed by Joe Dante) These movies seem to follow a pattern, get a really lame premise, get some teen actors looking for their big break, hire some B and C-list stars for some name recognition, and, since it’s 2012, film it in 3-D.

The movie essentially tells how a band of piranha escape from a lake and into a nearby water slide park. But WAIT, it’s not JUST a water-slide park, but one that has an ADULTS only section! So, YES, we are treated to the requisite (straight from cheese-ball seventies movies) scenes of nude babes jumping up and down in the pool, down the slides, and running around in slow motion. Is this entertainment? Really? Of course, the piranha arrive just when the park is opening for the season, and the new (and yes, unscrupulous) manager doesn’t want to close it down when a lifeguard finds out about the little fanged fish swimming around.

While we ponder the whole unoriginality of the script (Jaws on a Waterside anyone?) we’re supposed to be distracted by the, yes, B and C list actors. In this one, we have Christopher Lloyd playing a marine biologist for a few scenes, Ving Rhames showing up as a crippled lifeguard looking for revenge on the piranha for what they did to him in the last movie, and David Hasselhoff, who probably is the brightest light in the movie, riffing off of his Baywatch character while putting in an appearance as himself as a lifeguard on opening day.

Oh yeah, this film is bloody, (there’s some scenes with kids getting killed that I guess, we’re supposed to laugh at) has a high body count, and just generally bombards the viewer with blood, crude humor and or nudity. Because, after all, isn’t that what the movies are all about?

(Oh look! I’M being tongue-in-cheek now!)

By Bill Taylor

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Film Review: What To Expect When You’re Expecting – Directed by Kirk Jones

May 18th, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

“What To Expect When You’re Expecting”
directed by Kirk Jones
Lionsgate

When traveling on an elevator with some fellow male movie critics after the press screening of the new movie “What To Expect When You’re Expecting,” one of them asked the others what they thought of it, and the general consensus was a series of grunts, grumbling that they didn’t like it, that it had nothing worthwhile to say. It’s a compelling thought to think if that really was true, or if that was their male psyche calling, because truth be told, This male reviewer didn’t mind the movie being what it was, a film about five women expecting a new child in their lives (through various circumstances) how the mothers to be, and the fathers, adapt to the about-to-be-new-addition to their household.

The Four Couples include a Hollywood couple trying to juggle their careers and pregnancy, a couple trying valiantly to have a child, a rich and spoiled couple dealing with their pregnancy in the most expensive way possible, an accidental pregnancy by a one night affair, and yes, a couple planning to adopt a baby from a third world country, These stories are all pretty independent of each other except for a few clumsy attempts at interweaving. Although, in multi-storied films like this, there are cases where you wish some of the stories could have been fleshed out a bit more – Case in point, in the accidental pregnancy storyline, which is interesting and enjoyable, the audience is drawn to like, and want these characters to be together, but instead it seemed rushed and dumped to the curb about half way in.

The movie definitely shines in the cast’s shoes. Standouts include the more-radiant-then-normal Cameron Diaz as the celebrity Mom-to-be, Ben Falcone as an anal Dad-To-Be who wonders if he can get over all his insecurities and be the best Dad he can be, while his OWN Dad (hilariously played by Dennis Quaid) is coasting through a pregnancy of his own with his trophy bride. As mentioned above. The accidental pregnancy’s characters seemed to be the most grounded though, via excellent performances by Anna Kendrick and Chase Crawford. It’s too bad the film does not spend more time with these characters. Perhaps getting rid of the Daddy Fight Club, a group of fathers that have their own rules and nuances, led by Chris Rock and Rob Huebel, while walking the park grunting about how cool being a dad is would have put more time in to to focus more on the main stories.

But these are little complaints, mind you. While “What To Expect” won’t be for everyone, (Like male critics, or perhaps most of the male population) it does offer enough enjoyable entertainment if you’re not expecting much.

By Bill Taylor

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Film Review: Headwinds (Des Vents Contraires) – Directed by Jalil Lespert

May 7th, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

HEADWINDS (Des Vents Contraires)
Directed by Jalil Lespert
AZ Films

At the start of “HEADWINDS (Des Vents Contraires), Sarah (portrayed remarkably by an unrecognizable Audrey Tautou) tells her husband Daniel (the always versatile Benoit Magimel) she’s had it up to here with his workaholic habits and his ignorance of his family and that she’s leaving, no question about it. The next day she indeed, has gone. But… where is she? When Daniel checks her work and finds out she’s not there, and phones around to her friends to find out she’ hasn’t been to their places either, the mystery just deepens. Quite intriguing. A mystery about a woman who disappears completely. What happened to her? Will the husband find her? Is her disappearance suspicious? How interesting.

This movie, unfortunately, doesn’t go that route.

Instead, the film fast forwards a year later (this is becoming a trend in the movies this reviewer is seeing lately), and we see Daniel essentially floating through life, not really caring about anything since his wife’s disappearance. He and his children have sort of become distant from themselves and other people, he doesn’t trust the police since they treated him as a suspect in regards to the disappearance, and is really not wanting any outside help for all the demons lurking inside of him. So instead of what could have been a decent mystery, the film turns out more of a portrait Of A tortured man. Although the film is definitely well acted, with Magimel and the two kids playing his children turn out strong performances. It is easy to feel the film could have been a lot more than it was, how the film kept teasing us of what kind of an anti-hero Paul is, especially when the police come knocking on his door when a friend of his is wanted for child abduction, and he’s not forthright on his answers.

The relationship between himself and other people he believes have been wronged by the law system certainly is INTERESTING, but mixing the two elements, the self-pathos movie with a did-he-do-it mystery doesn’t really work. This is especially obvious in the conclusion, where we’re supposed to feel an overwhelming of emotion, where we’ve just spent the last hour and a half or so not really sympathizing for a character we don’t care much about.

By Bill Taylor

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Film Review: The Raid: Redemption – Directed By Gareth Evans

April 17th, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

The Raid: Redemption
Directed By Gareth Evans
Sony Pictures Classics

Right off the top, since this is bugging me, the new movie, “The Raid: Redemption” is not part of a series of movies you might have missed… There’s no, like, “Raid 1” or “Raid Pre-demption”, nope, we’re diving right to “Raid: Redemption”. Seriously, why add “The Redemption” to the perfectly fine title “The Raid”?

Having said that, “The Raid: Redemption” luckily redeems itself and is a fun chop-socky movie full of innovative fights and weapon-play, All you need to know about the plot: a SWAT team swarms a drug pin’s apartment building that he runs. Each level contains an army of men willing to defend the building at all costs. Oh there are some subplots in there as well, about the secret that one of the drug pin’s henchmen has, and the REAL reason why they’re going in with a SWAT team without much experience, but really, are you in there for the plot.

We’re there for the fights of course, and what fights they are! They do seem inspired by the gritty violence of Oldboy (there’s even a scene with a hammer) but that’s not to say they they’re not inventive with what they do. All the hand combat here looks realistic to a degree that anyone… well, anyone with years and years and years of practice could do. The film does borrow from a lot of movies, especially, yes, The Matrix, Wanted, and there’s even a fight ‘borrowed’ from Star Wars:The Phantom Menace where a Kick-Ass-Bad-Guy meets up with our heroes to take ‘em on singlehanded!

As for the plot, the premise is certainly unique (unless you remember “The Protecter” Tony Jaa running head-first and uncut up a tower) level after level of thugs waiting to fight. But… I sort of wanted more. I actually was looking for more gimmick in the building itself. Like, when you get higher you’ll face some guys with experience in some different forms of martial arts, or booby trapped floors, and making the floors harder after each level. It seems that every floor we went up, the foes were more guys to fight, just like the last level.

As stated before, the plot is… NOT IMPORTANT. If it’s fight after fight you want, with original ways of doing it, this is the movie for you. A kick-butt movie from the far east does it, with a movie with so much sheer originality, that the American studios already have in plans a remake set to debut in 2013. It’s Title? “The Raid”. Thank you America!

By Bill Taylor

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Copyright © 2004-2012 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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Film Review: Lockout – Directed by Stephen Leger & James Mather

April 17th, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Film Review: Lockout
Directed by Stephen Leger & James Mather
EuropaCorp Distribution

If the words “Guy Pearce, Action Movie Star” gets you all excited, then “Lockout” may be the movie for you. The actor, most well known for his roles in “Priscilla, Queen Of The Desert” and “Memento” proves himself in the somewhat iffy sci-fi/action genre in the new movie “Lockout” This surprised me, because coming into this movie, I thought he might be too old for the part (Pearce is 44) but, being the versatile actor he is, he plays the part quite brilliantly, a mix of the sort-of-seen-it-all Rick Dreckard of Blade Runner and the somewhat-insane-yippee-kai-yay John McClane of Die Hard fame. Pearce portrays the main character, Snow, as a curiously amused, bulked up (Pearce gained quite a bit of muscle mass for this movie) disgraced Secret Service Agent who is assigned to rescue the president’s daughter from a maximum security station in space, when all the most vicious inmates (obviously) are released out of their suspended animation pods by a crazed inmate. Soon they overpower the guards, and now the US Government has to do something!

Created from an “idea” by Luc Besson, (that’s right, an “idea”, doesn’t really require to get the wheels turning0, Snow is brought into the mission as somewhat of a deal between he and the Secret Service to spare him punishment over a bogus espionage case leveled against him that he still wants to get cleared up. LUCKILY. One of the people that can get him cleared is a prisoner of that same space station! Perfect! There’s also another problem, the space station, because it’s now mostly unmanned, is going to crash into the earth soon! (No, really)

Even though the script BARELY rises before “Direct-To-DVD” quality, Guy Pearce adds a lot of fun and personality to his role, dealing with all the extremely dangerous (but curiously all British) inmates while rescuing the blonde and bland Maggie Grace playing the President’s daughter, AND trying to figure out the espionage plot against him AND… YES! Trying NOT to have that space station crash into earth! It’s a bit of a silly ride, but it’s good popcorn fun, and provides good entertainment for your movie dollar.

By Bill Taylor

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Copyright © 2004-2012 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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Film Review: Bully – Directed by Lee Hirsch

April 5th, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Film Review: Bully
Directed by Lee Hirsch
Alliance Films

Certainly one of the most controversial movies of the year because of the MPAA deciding to slap the movie with a “R” rating because of it’s language, the movie “Bully” truly does deserve to be seen by everyone (The Weinstein Group, the distributors of this film apparently believe so too, as they recently have chosen to release the film in the US unrated (The film oddly enough has been rated PG here in British Columbia and most of Canada))

“Bully” explores the problem of bullying in the school system today by presenting us with various stories of kids. We meet Alex, who is trying to make it through first year of High School, trying to shrug off the seemingly daily potshots at him, Kelby, a 16 year old who must come to face to face with a whole town almost when she comes out as a lesbian, and Ja’Meya, who, because of constant bullying, takes matters to the extreme to finally once and for all deal with the kids picking on her. We also meet two sets of parents who have to deal with the loss of a child who stunningly take their own lives because they can’t take it anymore.
Although bullying happens all over the world, the filmmakers concentrate in the bible belt area of the United States, which ix one of the problems I have about this film. Because of this, the viewers may be led to believe that part of what causes bullying is class, which is probably not true, but the film doesn’t really touch on the issue, even though most of the subjects seem to be living in the lower middle class bracket. A little broader scope of subjects would have helped definitely in this regard.
But with the subjects we have, though, the film IS a damning look at how the school system is woefully unequipped in dealing with this problem. Schools seemingly want to brush it off with “kids will be kids” argument, knowing their hands are tied most of the time with the shortfall of teachers and possible lack of discipline (most of the kids who are the bullys seem to get off with just a talking to). What more, the parents somehow have to share some of the blame. Alex’s father is pretty much a “you shouldn’t let the kids do that to you” finger wagger, (his Mom, thankfully, is a bit more ballsier). So there’s all these factors, and when the schools and parents are helping, what is left for a kid to do? We do see some results, both extreme and hopeful. All make for amazing and harrowing viewing.
Bully is certainly making people think and talk about the subject (I, for one, the hopeless geek I was in school, seem to have been spared on the most part because of, yes, class and some amazingly protective friends and family) and is certainly required viewing for all kids, young and old to see.

Opens April 13th 2012, This FRIDAY!

By Bill Taylor

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Copyright © 2004-2012 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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Film Review: Mirror Mirror – Directed by Tarsem Singh

March 30th, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Film Review: Mirror Mirror
Directed by Tarsem Singh
Relativity Mediaales

Just the latest in a long line of modern retelling of classic fairytales, Mirror Mirror is a lightweight film with just enough inspired moments to keep you entertained. Kids and young teens will enjoy themselves, but adults looking for more substance should search elsewhere.

Mirror Mirror tells the story of Snow White, but from the viewpoint of the evil Queen. All the major plot points are the same: an evil queen (Julia Roberts) steals control of a kingdom and an exiled princess (Lily Collins) enlists the help of seven dwarves to defeat her. A charming prince (Armie Hammer) shows up to save the day, and even the poison apple makes a cameo appearance.

All of the leads do as best a job they can with the script, which is at times cheesy and out-of-place (like a 90s film but not in a good way). Roberts is haughty in the role of the evil Queen, but at times she leans into campy territory. Her interactions with Snow White are suitably cruel, which makes her inevitable downfall all the more satisfying to watch. Collins does a decent job as Snow White; her innocence and beauty make her a lovely princess, but her action sequences believability. Finally, Armie Hammer is charming as the Prince Alcott. I’ve enjoyed him in every film that he has been in since The Social Network; he doesn’t take himself too seriously here, as evidenced in a scene where he falls in “puppy love.”

The film does also redeems itself through some fun scenes brought to life by director Tarsem Singh. The mind behind last year’s epic “Immortals,” Tarsem lets loose with a wooden marionettes vs dwarves fight scene, and a dragon that stalks our heroes in the film’s climax; both quite intense. The costumes from the late Eiko Ishioka are also delightful, and bring a refreshing colour palette to the screen.

If you have children and young teens who are looking for something non-animated to watch, then you could do worse than Mirror Mirror. Of course, you could do a lot better too.

Rating: 2 / 4 stars

PS: Mirror Mirror is only the first of two remakes of Snow White being released within a three-month window. The second is the more adult-oriented Snow White and The Huntsman, starring Charlize Theron, Chris Hemsworth and Kristen Stewart

OPENS TODAY, March 30th 2012 NATIONWIDE!

By Daniel Chai

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Film Review: One Life Directed by Michael Gunton and Martha Holmes

March 25th, 2012 Filed under: Reviews - Film by Editor in Chief

Film Review: One Life
Directed by Michael Gunton and Martha Holmes
BBC Earth Films

Nature Documentaries have sure come a long way since my time in Elementary School. Remember when the teacher would roll in the TV on the cart from the library, and you would get all excited only just to learn it was a documentary…. On rocks… BORING!

Thank goodness for BBC Earth Films, who have somehow managed to make nature documentaries exciting. The creators of Earth – The Movie and Deep Blue are back with their latest film One Life, which showcases the extraordinary ways that animals live in some of the harshest environments in the world.

One Life lives up to its tagline, “The incredible journey that connects us all.” It is filled with absolutely jaw-dropping shots accompanied by music from award-winning composer George Fenton. From frozen oceans, baking deserts, and lush, dense forests, you feel like you’re there in the raw.

The film is segmented into various chapters: birth and child-rearing, survival techniques, the hunt for food, and of course, mating season. And each chapter showcases a wide variety of animals in an engaging way. Laugh out loud as the aptly named Pebble Toad escapes from the also-aptly named Toad Eating Tarantula by literally rolling down a mountain. Grab your seat as a baby ibex is chased all over a mountain by a hungry fox. And fall in love as massive male humpback whales launch themselves into the air to win the affection of a female.

With One Life clocking in under 90 minutes, it moves along at a rapid pace so you never tune out. Also interesting to note is that almost every story featured in the film contains either an animal filmed for the first time, a behaviour that has been captured for the first time, or a new filming technique which has been applied to give a familiar scene an unfamiliar look.

And did I mention that the narrator of One Life is Daniel Craig? That’s right – James Bond himself. If that alone doesn’t make you want to see this film, I don’t know what will.

Rating: 4 / 4 stars

PS: The baby ibex gets away.

In Theatres Nationwide NOW

By Daniel Chai

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Copyright © 2004-2012 ABORT Magazine. All Rights Reserved. Reproduction of this publication, in whole or in part, in any form or medium without express written permission from Abort Media Publishing Corporation (AMP Corp.) is prohibited. All use is subject to our Terms of Use.

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